According to those familiar with the situation

There are millions of Smiths out there. There are pages and pages of Smith very close to you, in your local telephone book. Can a Smith date a Smith? A certain surname?

It's a common name, says someone who'd like me to be happy. It's almost as bad a dating a co-worker, though. It sits in your mind every time you see, think, say something to her.

No. It's strange, says someone familiar with the situation. That's true. But is that the only reason? No. An excuse. It's something you say to yourself. She's four years younger. Age doesn't matter, according to someone familiar with the situation. So I think of other reasons. Can I kiss someone that I know has kissed someone that I know? I'm almost disgusted by it. Yes. But this isn't the real reason either.

You can't be with anyone right now because they are not on your mind at the time, say sources close to home. They don't have your attention. They aren't talking to me, but to someone staring off, looking out the window, contemplating the madness of the world. Or worse. This is unfair to others, assures someone who's been there before. You put yourself in these situations. Sometimes on purpose, I'm told by a by-stander. You make matters worse by making matters that don't really matter matter. I trust this person because of his proximity to me at this time.

Or maybe I'm just not attracted to this girl. Wouldn't come up with excuses, wouldn't look out the window if I was. But how do you tell someone that? Direct them to your blog, an immediate family member mentions.

2 comments:

Anonymous said...

She was drunk when she called you - you were drunk when you kissed her. You imagine infactuation where there is disinterest. She doesn't look at you because she didn't want you in the first place. Usually she justs wants to be alone. Why it has taken an entire month to communicate this, I do not understand.

Carson K. Smith said...

Anan? Ahh, Miss, how sweet "Sshe" is (was). O.K. so alcohol has a role in this tale, but so does she.

Unbiased or impartial she's not (she's a character!). Let's make no mistake. Maybe you (she) meant uninterested (not interested).

I never said there was infatuation (extravagant short-lived passion); though you bring up a good point about her (the short-lived thing).

Sometimes when we have something to say, we say it (wrong in meaning it may be); sometimes we blog it (of course, no one is reading). I could always call her, or she me.